Remember a time when you discovered something new, or you had an awesome idea and you just couldn’t wait to share it with someone special? So you called them up on the phone and shared your thought/idea excitedly with great expectation that the other person would share in your enthusiasm? But instead they totally shot you down? That person was a Dream Stealer.
There are different types of Dream Stealers:
- Captain Negative. These are the people that don’t like anything that anyone tells them. They’re just down right negative, like, all the time. No matter what good idea you throw their way, they’ll shoot it down pretty much right away.How to handle them: Truthfully, avoid these types of people as much as you can in all aspects of life. I know that sounds harsh but it comes from experience and love.Sometimes, you might be living with Captain Negative – maybe a spouse or a parent or a child or other family member. If it’s someone you dearly love, then there may be bigger issues at hand here than them shooting down your ideas. If they’re abusively negative, like they call you stupid for your ideas, I would seek professional help such as counseling.
PS. You and your ideas are NOT stupid! God put those great ideas and talents inside of you when he created you, and you were created so that He could love you. Nothing about you is stupid. <3
If it’s a friend or a co-worker that’s Captain Negative then maybe don’t share your ideas with them. This can be a huge bummer because you want to share your life with people you spend time with and that you like! But, here’s the truth: the more time you spend with super negative people, the more negative you will become. I know this from personal experience.
- Loving Less-Is-Best Lassie. These are people who love you, and you likely love them right back! They may be soft spoken and compassionate – ya know, the huggers!You feel like you can trust them with important information or you might go to them for advice.So, you share your idea with them, expecting a smile + a hug + a “that’s a great idea, hunny!” but instead you get, “I really don’t think that’ll work out for you because you’re not [ insert their insecurity here] enough.”Did you catch that? Their insecurity.
People rub their own insecurities off on people who are trying to do something new, fun and exciting every.single.day. It’s maddening, really. Because they were, and still are, afraid to open that new business, or write that book, or buy that new car, or get the job they always really wanted, they are afraid for you. They’re afraid you’ll fail if you try. They truly are being negative and shooting down your dream because they love you.
As much as it stinks to admit this, you do need people like that in your life. They’re the ones who’ll keep you grounded + humble. However, don’t take TOO much stock in what they’re saying. Look at their life – have they ever done what you’re wanting to do? Did they try at their dreams and fail? If they initially failed did they just give up? Look at all of these aspects before you invest in their advice, because they’re advice may not be worth much.
On the other hand, if you’re wanting to open a gift shop and your friend who’s owned a gift shop for thirty years says it’s not the best idea in today’s market, you may want to listen up/invest in that stock. 😉
- President Opinionated. Very much like the type of Dream Stealer I mentioned above, President Opinionated is insecure about their own lives, dreams, and failures, only these are usually people that you’re only associated with. Or maybe you don’t even know their first name!These are people that love to hear themselves talk, and they feel the need to give their opinion whenever possible. They have no stock in your life or your feelings and they truthfully don’t care whether you go forward with your ideas or not. Like I said above, look at their life – what do they do for a living? If a lawyer is telling you that you shouldn’t go to Med school because it’s a waste of time and money, I would say to just smile and nod, then walk away.
There will be people in your life that truly love you and care about you that give great advice. Take it, depending on who they are and what their personal life looks like. Feel free to ask them why they think what they do. Don’t be afraid to pull more from them because it’ll either help you decide to take their advice or leave it. They may have some really great tips that’ll make your idea/dream even better!
At the end of the day, you need to follow through with what great thing you feel strongly to do. The thing Holy Spirit is telling you to push forward with. Pray about it. Ask those people that love you to pray for you. Even the Dream Stealers. If they can’t buy a ticket to board your excitement train, they could at least pray for you!